*Disclaimer: Hi guys! This post may contain affiliate links. This means I may earn a commission if you make a purchase using my link. Don’t worry, it doesn’t cost you anything extra! For more info, please see my disclosure.
The information shared here is not financial advice. It's just my opinion and meant for general informational purposes. For personalized financial guidance, please consult a qualified financial advisor.

My job is Making Me Depressed But I Can’t Quit

Is your job killing you, but you can’t afford to quit? I’ve been in that situation and was not too fond of it. I snoozed my alarm several times in the morning, and I was late to work several times. Even at some point, I cried in the office bathroom quietly.  I hated my job.

But you are not alone. Many others are in the same boat. According to a report by Gallup, 87% of workers worldwide are emotionally disconnected from their workplaces.

In my case, it was not about my savings, but the work visa and other legal situations prevented me from finding another job for almost four years. I hated it.

I wouldn’t have a problem paying the bills for the next few months, but I’ll probably get kicked out of the country if I quit and can’t find another job within 60 days.

Whether you can’t quit your job because of no savings or a legal situation – I hope this blog post can be a good start for you.

Should I quit my job if I absolutely hate it?

First, quitting your job without having another one lined up or an emergency fund is probably not the best idea. Not only you’ll lose your healthcare coverage (or have to pay an exorbitant amount of money for COBRA coverage), you’ll be more likely to be desperate and take any offers on the table.

Yes, I did this in the past and looking back, I wish I had done a few things before quitting without another job, such as switching team or discussing it with my manager. Finding a new job with no consistent paycheck has made it more stressful. Usually, it would be better not to quit until you find something better.

But if your day job triggers mental and physical health problems, quitting might be best. Check your unemployment law in your state and see if you can claim unemployment even if you quit due to certain conditions.

First thing first – at least you are employed.

I know… I hate to be told to be grateful when I’m already in a bad situation. But thinking about what could be worse can be helpful to change your mood and put your worries in a better perspective. Remember that many are unemployed; luckily, you are not one of them.    

Finding out why you want to quit

Do you hate your manager? Is the pay too low? Do you feel your career is stagnant? Do you really hate the career, or is it the workload/tedious project? Can you request an internal transfer? Or, do you hate the work and feel like a fish climbing a tree?

Understanding why you hate the job in the first place is helpful so you can address the actual pain point. Below are some ideas.

Is your job very stressful, or are you underpaid? or both?

Maybe you could talk to your manager about your workload before quitting. Compile your salary research on Indeed, ZipRecruiter, PayScale, and other salary research data, pick the highest average/median number and bring this to your manager. If they care, they should at least bring this to HR.  

If your manager is a jerk (mine was, too – he essentially ignored my request), then you should start sending out your resume. Consider talking to your colleagues and applying for a job internally.

Do you hate what you do and feel like a fish climbing a tree?

If that’s the case, you may want to consider a career change. Spending 40+ hours a week working on things you hate is probably not a great way to live.  Sometimes pivoting to something that aligns more with your values can be an answer.

I made a lateral career change in my late 20s and was so glad I did it. I can finally enjoy what I do (or at least, I hate it less).

Maybe the people you work with are toxic? Try to establish boundaries and only talk to them when necessary. Even I’d be too friendly (but no need to be rude or mean).

My boss likes to be rude and mean when he is in a bad mood, and sometimes he is rude due to his own stupidity, i.e., he did not read my email carefully.  I stopped being too friendly and just put on my poker face when he made a joke. He started to respect me more. Maybe the fact that I have built my FU money makes me less tolerable of BS at work.

I also started to be a bit too friendly with a colleague, and she started demanding my time, so I stopped being too available. I keep the conversation with them short and sweet.

Work is just really dull, and there is no opportunity for growth
A few options:
– Taking additional projects voluntarily
– Taking online courses and additional certification
– Start applying for a role in a different company

Honestly, this is how I truly feel right now. I’ve been in the company for two years, and it doesn’t seem there is an opportunity for growth. I take online courses on Coursera and have started creating my project for my portfolio while also interviewing with other companies. I also plan to volunteer on a project to expand my leadership and project management skills. But you can certainly express this to your manager and communicate your needs while you keep looking.

On a side note, I’m also always interested in having my small side business for my future self (either Youtube or Blogging), so I strongly recommend you to start one too.  

If you reach your breaking point and hate your job, and it gets to the point where it affects your mental and physical health, then you should make a quitting plan ASAP.

Make sure you have enough savings to sustain yourself in the next few months. Find ways to save money and squeeze as many dollars into your savings. Get a part-time job on the weekend or borrow from family to earn some extra cash. Wait tables, babysit, become a barista, anything you feel comfortable doing but remember, don’t overwork yourself!

What to do when I can’t afford to leave my job – I got bills to pay

Unfortunately, you have to find ways to build your savings. Unless you can convince your boss to lay you off (or if you live in a country with a better unemployment system and healthcare), I’d recommend saving as much as possible.

The easiest way to save money now is to cut your expenses. Find room for improvement, such as replacing your expensive phone bills or eating out less. You have to make sacrifices that’ll be worth it in the end.

You can also earn money on the side, and here are some ideas:
– Freelancing
– Tutoring
– Bartending
– Dog Walking
– Babysitting
– Uber/Lyft driver
– Customer service/Online tech support
– Sell and get rid of your old stuff on eBay/Craiglist

Remember, once you give notice, you are essentially employed. You should cut out all non-necessary expenditures and be as intentional as possible with your spending during this time.

Use your LinkedIn network. Reach out to friends or family. Study hard and do a mock interview with friends/family. Going to networking events has helped me land more interviews.

How much money should I save before quitting my job?

A good rule of thumb is 3-6 months, but this can also depend on your situation. For instance, how bad your situation is, if you have family, whether you have support from family/friends, and maybe how risk-averse you are. I am personally on the conservative side, and I’d save at least three months of expenses.

Depending on your job market, you should be more pragmatic and expect to be unemployed for at least three months. Start calculating your monthly expenses, such as housing, transportation, food, utilities, and phone bills, and you’ll have a better idea of how much you should save.

But again, if your situation is really bad or you reach a breaking point, your mental health should be a priority. Save for a month and borrow the rest from your friends or family. Quitting your job will help you regain what you lost.

What to do when you can’t leave your job, i.e., work visa issues?

If you can’t leave your job because of things like a work visa, it is tough! Especially if your boss is a big jerk. If this is your case, I’d suggest not confronting your boss or HR. Based on my experience, they treated me worse, and HR was unhelpful. Try to switch teams if possible. Network as often as possible, and get to know other team members and their leaders.

Depending on your PR application, if it is possible to carry over your PR application to the next company, work just enough, so you won’t get fired, and use the time to apply for jobs, network, and interview skills.

If you like what you do, finding a new job climbing the corporate ladder may not be a bad idea. This would be an excellent way to get leadership experience.

But if you have a hunch that this wouldn’t be your career path, it would be wise to use the time to research your next career.

I was in this situation many years ago. I couldn’t just leave because my working visa is non-profit (which means I can only work for a nonprofit company), and my PR application is already in process. It was terrible, and I was depressed and lost.

I knew for sure that I was no longer interested in being a software engineer despite the higher pay potential. I wanted a role that involved more human interaction. It took me a while to find a role I like within the realm of IT.

So, I used this time to research my next role and talk to many people. I took business, finance, and marketing courses on Coursera to see where my interest lies. After receiving my green card, I also started an amazon business which was unsuccessful in the end because I couldn’t compete with other Chinese sellers ☹ (although I generated a few thousand in revenue).

But all in all, despite the job I disliked, the fact that I made some progress in my dream career quest made my life less depressing at that time. It made me feel more hopeful about my life.

I hope no one ever has to be in this position because it was a bad situation. You want your freedom, but you have to wait several years and can’t make more time. If you are an international student, I will pick a career path that you are interested in because there is a likelihood that you’ll have to work in the same company for many years. Perhaps you can consider transitioning internally but consult a lawyer to avoid affecting your visa application.  

What if this job pays a lot?

If you have a job that pays a lot but don’t like it, you’re not alone! Many people face this same problem. A high salary is great because it gives you financial stability, but it’s also important to be happy in your job. It’s a hard choice to make.

In this situation, it’s important to think about what’s best for you in the long run. Should you stay in your job because of the money, or should you try to find a job you like better? It’s a good idea to talk to your boss about how you’re feeling and see if there’s anything that can be changed to make you happier at work. If that doesn’t work, you can start looking for other jobs while still keeping your current job.

I quit my software engineering role when I made ~78k. Maybe I’d have a different opinion if I made 200k. But this is all relative. How many hours do you work? Is it very stressful or maybe boring? Too much stress can be detrimental to your health. Is it worth your health problems and expensive bills down the road? Or, maybe you almost achieve your FI/RE number?

Remember, having a lot of money is good, but happiness is just as important. Don’t be afraid to make a change if it will make you happier.



How long should you stay in a job you hate?

There’s no one-size-fits-all answer to this question, as it depends on various factors unique to each person’s situation. Some people may find it helpful to stay in a job they’re not thrilled about for a short period to reach a specific financial goal or gain valuable experience. Others may need to stay longer to secure their financial stability.

It’s essential to do what’s best for you and your well-being. If you’re feeling overwhelmed or unhappy in your current job, it might be a good idea to take some time to reassess your situation and think about what you want for your future.

You can also consider reaching out to someone you trust for support, such as a mentor, career counselor, or therapist. Remember, you deserve to be happy and fulfilled in your career, and taking the time to evaluate your options can help you get there.

Should I start my own business?


Don’t trust everything on the internet. The Internet may tell you to start your own business now, but I beg to differ. I did this once and honestly regretted it. I quit with no clear plan because I assumed my amazon business would be successful after generating a few thousand dollars in revenue, but it did not. The following product that I picked turned out to be a dud. I also didn’t enjoy the process most of the time. Then I became too hard on myself and impatient over my business progress. Eventually, I gave up and returned to the 9-5 job.

Maybe you’ve been told to start your blog or a Youtube channel. It is possible to be successful on these platforms, but the process won’t happen overnight. It can take years. I think it’s better to hustle on this side when you have a consistent paycheck until you generate a steady income.

You can enjoy the process much more when there is no definitive date. You don’t have to worry about the analytics and can take your time to create content that you care about.  

I wish you good luck, and remember this is all temporary, and as long as you have a plan and execute them, soon it’ll get better!